Lonely

I was lonely at dinner tonight. There's only so much a 19-year-old can contribute to conversation with her parents and their friends.

Then two more of my dad's friends joined us all for a drink. No glance in my direction or acknowledgement. I may as well have been wearing an Invisibility Cloak with all that shit.

I got on the phone with Ernest, which was okay at the time but made me really down after. For like 20 minutes I listened to him and his friends have fun.

That's great- I don't begrudge them that. It's just that it made me think after- "when was the last time I was with a friend at their house for fun?"

I can actually tell you- Christmas Eve, with my best friend from middle school. For about 3 hours in the afternoon.

I've never been to my best friend's house. I haven't even seen her for like three weeks. It's just crazy!

I'm sorry if this is coming out really pathetic. I'm on vacation, just came from one of the prettiest cities in the state and am now in one of my favorite places in the world. I should be happy. And I was when we were exploring.

Dinnertime rolled around and that kind of went down the toilet.

Ah well. Hakuna matata. I hope tomorrow's awesome. :)